First Roll!

Today I finally got the prints of my first film roll.

I have way too many things to say about it and I feel much more! Let’s start with how happy I am that I didn’t “entirely” over/underexpose the photos. Since I shot without depending on a light meter (which was broken in the camera). That means, I’m on the right track in understanding exposure and light. I lost a lot of details, that’s for sure but for a first time shooting film and using a camera I haven’t used before; I’ll give myself a break!

I’m not happy with the print quality though (you’ll see, my ancient scanner didn’t help either!). They even scratched the negative! This is the only lab left in the city and they’re going to close in about a month. I knew they’re not going to give a hoot if I complained so I didn’t.

Another issue was the film. The only film available was Agfa Vista 200. I wanted a black and white film preferrably tri-x 400. Anyways, I was happy enough to shoot film so it’s fine. For next time, I already ordered Tri-x from Europe and I’ll also send my negative to be developed there. no more labs here.

Okay, now to show you what I’m talking about.

Here’s my first disaster of a photo! I had serious problems with manual focusing. I think I got only 2 or 3 sharp photos, the rest are so-so or comletely off.

cats_01

I wanted to get closer to the cats but I was afraid they’d run away.

Next few photos still shaky but I was getting the hang of it.

The dull colors made me decide to turn all of them to monochrome later on. Well, this is good red… I think.

redbike

I can certainly enhance the overal quality of the photos on photoshop but then again, if I wanted vivid colors and clinical look, I’d just shoot digital. It’s exactly why I wanted a black & white film. In my opinion, that’s where film photography shines as opposed to digital black and white and color films. Well that’s just what I get from seeing all kinds of film photos but maybe after I shoot all kinds of films myself my impression will change.

Back to the photos. there’s the decent ones in which I got the closest to a correct exposure.

The few exposures left in the rool I shot indoors and they turned out okay.

I haven’t scanned all the photos yet so I’ll post more once I do.

I’m certain about one thing now, I definitely have to learn to develop films and get me a scanner that scans negative! All that after I get a SLR though! The one I used I simply borrowed.

I chose the worst time possible to start shooting film since almost all the labs are shutting down in my country. It’ll be difficult but I’ll manage.

 

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The Word I Didnt Know!

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything based on the Daily Prompts. So I thought it’s about time to check today’s word. Outlier. “I have no idea what that means!” that’s what I thought and that is the truth. English isn’t my native language so nobody can blame me for not knowing a word that doesn’t exist in the 3 dictionaries I own!

Anyways, I looked it up online and imagine my surprise when I finally learned that outlier actually describes me quite accurately.

I’m currently living the whole detachment from society thing. It started with me having a loner type character and a whole different set of interests than the people in my circles. I isolated myself, put everything I have in what I love doing until before I knew it I’m off the board, off the loop and off the map.

I was fine with it for some time until I realized that it wasn’t good for me. I think I talked about this in previous posts. I still don’t mind being an outlier; to my understanding of the term, I think i’m still an outlier but I’m working on changing that.

This blog and these types of posts are in fact part of me trying to change. I know my writing sucks and sometimes quite depressing but it helps me.

speaking of depressing, here’s a depressing self-portrait portraying the outlier within (or rather, without)!

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[Journal]Overworked Mind

Daily Prompt: Overworked. the word inspired my journal entry today. it kinda hit the mark. I’ll be sharing parts of the entry edited to give less specific details but more coherent.

Considering the word literally, I am the exact opposite of overworked – being unemployed and all! However, that in itself is making my mind work forever in a torus of thoughts. 

In this undefined stretch of time, my mind is looking for a space where it would be comfortable with its state of being. That’s what minds do, they protect themselves.

Denial or escapism… it doesn’t really matter; It is tiring! For how long can a mind handle the strain of an existential conflict, a dichotomy of consciousness, a war within its own borders?

A mind that is fundamentally postive but is wrestling with a mind that has been altered by the negativity of its time-yielding character. A constant conflict of action versus inaction, of strength versus weakness. 

Within my own limits and my tolerance for trauma (for some people, this isn’t even worth mentioning), overworked is one way to describe my state of mind these days.

I only have myself to blame for whoever I am right now. I also know that I have to come to terms with the person that Ive become. I’d like to think that being aware of and recognizing that is a step forward towards postivity. because it is time to settle things. I am tired of running inside my mind’s maze. 

one thing I also need for sure is a swift kick in the butt!