States of Mind: Uncertainty

Uncertainty taken today at five in the afternoon.

Camera: CyberShot DSC-H7 edited with Analog Efex Pro 2

uncertainty

I am plagued by uncertainty when certainty is required. Perhaps it is in big part the reason why my life isn’t moving forward as fast as I want. I’ve came to believe in doing things in my own pace though. If I haven’t, I’d have gone crazy a long time ago.

Olympus OM-1

I should have started learning photography by using an SLR instead of a digital piece!

A local photographer was more than kind to let me use one of his old SLRs. He gave me a fully manual and fully mechanical camera from 1971. I was hoping for a semi-auto to get me started but hey, I can’t complain. After starting the shoot, I was actually glad that I got this one.

om-1

Its through-the-lens exposure meter is broken so that made using it a real challenge. At first I was overwhelmed but then I thought what the hell! I wanted to test my understand of exposure and light so I embraced the fact. We’ll see in a few days once I get the prints back. I’m pretty sure most if not all of them are off but this is my first roll and I’m not stopping until I master film photography one way or another.

I can tell you one thing I certainly enjoyed shooting with it. The strudiness of it and the sound of its shutter, everything about it. Taking a photo with my mirroless camera takes a couple of seconds; I can always fix it later. With this one, I have to work it out from all aspects and be patient and considerate of everything before I release the shutter. It demands respect for each photo I plan to take. I guess that’s what I learned from my first time using a SLR.

If I’m lucky and one or two photos from today’s roll are good exposures, I’ll scan and post them once the prints are ready. To be honest, I’m not that optimistic.

Walls

 

Today’s photo is titled Walls. And yes, I consider the sky a wall too (or anything concrete and that isn’t endless space!) because I consider my world a bubble. Overall, The photo is a rendition of the future that I see. It might be sunny up there but to me it looks fake.

walls

One Year on WordPress

So WordPress has notified me that I’ve been here for a year.

It didn’t feel like it though. The reason is I’m not contantly active. So far, I haven’t made friends or got myself a big following but I’m pleased to say that I have crossed off a goal from my list of things to achieve by writing a blog. I am now more comfortable in sharing. I may not be where I want to be but It’s definitely a start.

So I guess I’m not leaving wordpress any time soon.

Currently, I have a 106 followers and I want to thank them all. I can’t believe anyone would want to read my depressing poetry or take the time to read my personal rantings but you guys did so thanks!

Recently, I’ve been putting everything I have into photography and I hope you’re enjoying my photos. I’m planning on posting at least a photo everyday through my second wordpress year. I aim to continue my current focus on unconventional photography and also a bit of the nature/landscape stereotypes.

I’ll start with this photo that reflects my state of mind lately which unfortunately is more chaotic than it is stable.

Stable_&_Chaotic

The Word I Didnt Know!

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything based on the Daily Prompts. So I thought it’s about time to check today’s word. Outlier. “I have no idea what that means!” that’s what I thought and that is the truth. English isn’t my native language so nobody can blame me for not knowing a word that doesn’t exist in the 3 dictionaries I own!

Anyways, I looked it up online and imagine my surprise when I finally learned that outlier actually describes me quite accurately.

I’m currently living the whole detachment from society thing. It started with me having a loner type character and a whole different set of interests than the people in my circles. I isolated myself, put everything I have in what I love doing until before I knew it I’m off the board, off the loop and off the map.

I was fine with it for some time until I realized that it wasn’t good for me. I think I talked about this in previous posts. I still don’t mind being an outlier; to my understanding of the term, I think i’m still an outlier but I’m working on changing that.

This blog and these types of posts are in fact part of me trying to change. I know my writing sucks and sometimes quite depressing but it helps me.

speaking of depressing, here’s a depressing self-portrait portraying the outlier within (or rather, without)!

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Chill! Have a Cup of Coffee!

Security is a heavy concept. I spent quite a while thinking about how I can deliver my take on it through a photograph. I didn’t go anywhere with my thoughts. So I said to myself: “Chill! get a coffee then you’ll figure it out.”

That was it! Coffee!

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See, I always think too much into things while I don’t really have to. I just needed to take it easy. What was a complicated concept now is a clear idea in my head.

If I think of security as peace of mind and/or happiness, I guess it’d be a number of things I’d feel comfortable and happy doing like having a cup of coffee or shooting photos among other things.

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About the Photos:

I was playing around with presets in Silver Efex Pro and I settled on these with minor edits because they’re soft on the eyes (at least, softer than my own B&W standard). So yeah, Chill!

Picks from April, 5th 2017

I wanted to shoot this same landscape at sunset hoping that it’d make the sky more interesting. I couldn’t get what I wanted. The problem was my position (the only position from where I can get the same shot) is too low to get me a colorful sunset sky.

That didn’t stop me from shooting a few. I picked this one to share.

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I didn’t shoot HDR. I tried it before and I didn’t like it. I prefer nature/landscape photos to be accurate or slightly enhanced. but I digress. What I want to say is that this photo doesn’t look top quality because I processed it out of the RAW image below. I do think it’s still a decent shot, just not good for print.

raw

After the sun sunk behind that hill, I went up again and looked for interesting silhouette subjects and found none. Luckily, my friend was with me and I took a few shots. I picked this one (it’s a cliché but still). Usually, sun flares are no good and I avoid them as much as possible but this one sort of made the shot.

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We went on a little further. I looked for more subjects, still nothing except this fence post of a fence that isn’t there! anyway, I grabbed a few shots here.

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On my way back home, I found this unfinished building (don’t know if it’s a house or not) with some grass in the front and the toppled barrel. I thought it’s a great chunk of imperfection.

When shooting in my hometown, I close the door on shooting perfect-looking photographs and be ready to look around and capture the things that make my town what it is, a faithful portrayal.

Anyone else in town wouldn’t shoot this unfinished house because it looks plain and if they did, they wouldn’t put the barrel in the frame. I truly believe that barrel made the shot! This is my town and this is how it looks like. Period.

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Here’s another patch of my town.

It’s not the most beautiful photo, that’s for sure. But the fact that I put bits of my town into a frame is a statement in itself. I’m making it beautiful and interesting.

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The next two are my favorites of the day! I found an old and abandoned house. I called it Frankenstein’s House and you’ll see why.

Frankenstein's_House-Door.jpg

Frankenstein's_House-Window.jpg

This turned out to be a longer post than I thought. sorry about that. I hope you enjoyed the photos. no worries if you didn’t though. You can lay it on me on a comment. I appreciate feedback. 🙂

Hope from the Lamp

These are one kind of photos I create when I’m bored inside the house, minimlistic black and white abstracts.

I took the photos. I edited them. And I had no idea what I was creating; It was me killing time, that’s all. However, now when I look at them, there is too much blackness and it feels like it’s trying to envelop the little bit of light left which is strong enough to hang on and actually manage to stay within the frame.

If I saw that much hope in these extremely simple frames then I guess I’m not as cynical as I thought.

Lines Between Shadows and Light

Technically they’re mostly midtones but I’m sure you get the idea.

I’m still in search for my own style. For that reason, I’m not shying away from shooting anything, and I mean anything! That’s the beauty of photography; it encompasses an infinity of subjects and meanings. The simplicity of this photo series might be its depth or it might be just a photo collection of a plain wall.

It doesn’t really matter much to me. I love shooting anything exactly because there’s no real meaning for it or there is something to it and it just sits there waiting for someone to see it.

Perhaps that ambiguity is how I want my photography to be in the future; I don’t know. What I know is that I’m going to keep putting my heart into exploring the realm of photography.